Thursday, December 22, 2016

Ug.

I shouldn't have promised myself I would post something every day...

I'm not really feeling any inspiration for writing today. It's been cold all day, to the point that I hunted down some of the pocket warmers I got last year and have them in my fingerless gloves, keeping my hands warm.

I had visitors today who got me updated on some local gossip I've missed out on being housebound by anxiety. Nothing too juicy, but it made me feel human for the first time in awhile and answered some questions about things I only saw one side of on Facebook. It helped that one of my visitors also suffers from anxiety and depression so we were able to swap stories and commiserate, one of those human things that you don't realize you need until you do it.

Inkwell was very cautious about the guests, hiding under my chair for a good 15 minutes, then sneaking out to sniff shoes. As both adult guests are cat-lovers and baby guest was just fussy, Inkwell enjoyed the shoe-sniffing and also checked out the Mommy-bag and baby carrier.

I'm finding interest in things I used to love, but had just ... just dropped ... just forgotten, while I was depressed. I think it's a good sign. I hope it's a sign I'm getting better. I still feel like I'm walking across a field of glass shards, and I have to be very careful or I'll cut myself and fall apart again, but it feels less terrible than the last few months. Like the clouds are finally lifting (slightly ironic, considering the weather).

Speaking of the weather, it looks like it might snow a bit tonight and tomorrow. I have arranged for an order of tamales, which means I will need to leave the house and visit a friend's house about a mile or so away. I hope Eric will take me, but I'm ready to drive myself if necessary. Tamales made by locals are some of the most awesome food in existence, and they've got a dozen waiting for me.

It's taken far longer to write this than it should have. I'll quit while I'm ahead and hopefully come up with more content for tomorrow...

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